Part III of a series on Empowering Language Patterns:
Get rid of the word SHOULD.
Using statements like I should meditate…. solicit guilt, rebelliousness and maybe even shame…Thoughts like “Dammit why didn’t I, I was supposed to!!” soon follow. These shame and fear based thought patterns do not take you to a powerful place, but often undermine motivation and positive intentions/thinking.
Find another word that elicits better responses:
Wish – won’t motivate most people
I would like to – nope won’t bring urgency
I need to – not quite there to bring about action
I want to – getting closer to a commitment
I have to – to authoritarian for most (defensiveness and rebellion follow)
I must – sounds too desperate
I am going to – will work for some.. gives me a way out…
I will – a personal agreement is made…much closer to getting me to do it (I can visualize it and imagine myself doing it, and based on that feeling and imagery I actually may do it!)
Another powerful method is to take what you want to do and turn it into an action verb.
“I am meditating tomorrow morning at 7 AM”. This should cause you to imagine not only doing it but the positive feeling, results, and benefits of doing it.
Questions: Do I see myself doing it in a certain place? Is it a movie, a video or a still picture? If it is a still picture, then I want to find better wording! I am meditating tonight! Turns it into a video clip. You can play with words and get it into a vibrant, colorful movie which will flow ( a little short movie) – chances are that you are 10 times more likely to do it. An emotional/physical state of being shift actually occurs and you can see the benefits of what you will gain from that, and then make a decision or commitment to do it.. The more detail to your imagery and the deeper you see, hear, feel, taste, and smell the difference the more energy you will have in your motivation to take action.
We do this from the negative side too creating negative video tapes…but the more positive imagery tapes we make to offset the negative the more empowered we will be to take right actions!